Major Saab and I had been in long distance relationship from the beginning which subsequently evolved into a long-distance marriage. I moved to the other side of the hedge a year ago when we finally got a chance to live together on the mountains😊.
One biggest drawback of being a Fauji is the numerous special events and occasions with family and friends we miss being part of. Regrettably, not everyone comprehends the challenges OGs face in terms of getting their ‘Chutti’!!! On a long run, men in uniform end up with only a few close friends who have the patience to understand both sides of the hedge! Even as an Army spouse- when we were in long distance, grasping the intensity of the situation on his end was ardous.
One of the weekday evenings I was riding back from work and Bangalore being Bangalore – had terrible traffic jam because of continuous rains. I was in the middle of traffic when I realized my scooter had a flat tyre. In exasperation, I pulled my scooter to the side and parked it under a tree and rushed to the nearest possible tea shop to take shelter.
After a few minutes the clouds showed mercy on me and decided to go elsewhere. I managed to get some help to drag the vehicle for half a km to a mechanic. While the mechanic was fixing the puncture, I decided to call Major Saab and let him know about the grave situation I was in, with a hope to get some attention in form of – “where are you? Are you fine? Are you drenched? “
I called him & dramatically explained the whole scene with a splash of onomatopoeia to help him visualize my plight. To my animated monologue, he very calmly replied – “oh good, get home safe and message me”.
I was dumbstruck. What??? Did I hear that right??
I ride myself everyday through this horrible traffic – manage my commute without depending on you, and you really can’t appreciate or at least show some worry?? I was thwarted! but by then my bike was ready and I decided to head home & then shower my disappointment.
Fast forward to years later when I was allowed to visit Major Saab because we were miya-biwi [husband & wife].
During one of my visits, he insisted he wanted to show me an important spot in his base, just a few kms from his room. We now call it the “Physical hotspot’, the place that was instrumental in ensuring I got my ‘chain ki neend’ [peaceful sleep], for two whole years.
Confused? Let me paint a picture for all of you…
Major Saab was all excited to take me to this mystery spot. He was dressed in an outfit that had many pockets both in the jacket and the trousers, where he carried a torch, some chocolates, a small water bottle, lighter and some dry fruits. He made sure I put on warm clothing from head to toe. On our way out of the room, he picked up a huge laathi (a heavy stick used as weapon for self defence) which was ornamented to function as a flame torch. Although I was highly tempted to bombard him with a zillion questions, I consciously decided to observe silently.
I followed him into the dark wilderness nervously. He meandered through the thick jungle, holding my hand like he knew every inch of the place. After strolling for a few kms, we heard distant howling and growling. He immediately switched on the flame torch with the help of the lighter he had picked. I realized we weren’t alone anymore; we were in fact trespassing into the habitat of omnivores.
After a few minutes we reached the foot of a small hillock, that housed a variety of shrubs with bright flowers. We started the ascent, when I started gasping. The water bottle & dry fruits came handy 🙂
After trekking through the shrubs for 20 minutes, we had reached the ‘Hotspot’. There it was, a beautiful old gigantic tree standing in all its glory in the middle of the under bush.
And I exclaimed, “We walked for one whole hour to see this tree?”, as I tried to catch my breath.
I saw something unusual on the tree. A rope was fastened to the uppermost branch of the tree, creating a loop. A mug was attached to the loop through a knot, establishing a small pulley-like system, albeit without an actual pulley. I wondered if this was a sacred place- Some sort of a wishing tree 🙂
Major Saab took my hand and narrated why this was an important spot in his daily routine. He would walk through the jungle to this tree everyday- put his phone in the mug while keeping it connected to his Bluetooth EarPods, raise and lower the mug until the phone picked up a signal, just so, he could make that mandatory phone call every single day…… to me 😊😊😊😊.
It was indeed a wish granting tree that ensured OGs speak to their loved ones.
It was at that moment I realized why having a flat tyre midst of a bustling familiar metropolitan city not surrounded by man-eaters, didn’t seem like a big threat for him to be worrisome.
During my following visits I learnt about the various other challenges he and his team face on a daily basis for which they would discover a ‘Jugaad’ solution – always with a smile!!!
I have shared one of the simplest instances that I am permitted to write about. The difficulties Faujis face, extend far beyond the imagination of civilians.
I urge all my readers who have friends/ cousins in the defense services to at-least plan one visit to the location they are posted in. It is only then one can understand why your Fauji missed attending the wedding or that special event, couldn’t return your call on time, couldn’t be there for you when you needed him/her – YOU WILL GET YOUR ANSWERS!!!
After all, they are going through all these privations to keep you and me safe!
November 18th, 2023 at 12:49 pm
No words can suffice the writing, the way the most important point about faujis n their jugaad with everyday life, the lesson everyone of us out here must learn, n the simple effective advice to many people back home , is superb. Hope somete soon a OTT platform wd find this n make a series on this.
November 18th, 2023 at 12:50 pm
🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
November 18th, 2023 at 12:54 pm
Beautifully penned down
November 18th, 2023 at 1:00 pm
Thank you 🙏🏽
November 18th, 2023 at 1:09 pm
Beautifully worded and conveyed.
November 18th, 2023 at 1:09 pm
🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
November 18th, 2023 at 1:10 pm
🙏🏻
November 18th, 2023 at 1:15 pm
Dear Gods above!!! This was like a mystery thriller! Yes, we take so much for granted! Each service has its own differently aweful/awe-inspiring set of challenges, and what our faujis go through is sometimes unimaginable! You have pen pictured it beautifully! Kudos to you, Preethi!
November 18th, 2023 at 1:17 pm
Thank you so much 🙏🏽
November 18th, 2023 at 3:02 pm
Oh I sooo love this …very close to my heart because my fauji too had found the hotspot in the hills of J&K! …. and in the last 25 years of service there have been quite a few of these …a milestone overlooking a valley at unimaginable altitude….a temple in the desert…a tent somewhere in the middle of nowhere!!!! Though the mug in the tree is truly unique 😁
You have rightly said that the extended family and friends must visit their fauji and then they would understand the reasons behind absence or even the way a fauji thinks and reacts!
November 18th, 2023 at 4:01 pm
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences 😊 means a lot 🙂 thanks for the feedback 😊
November 18th, 2023 at 7:27 pm
Wonderful❤️❤️
November 18th, 2023 at 8:11 pm
Thank you 🙏🏽
November 18th, 2023 at 8:54 pm
I just love how you manage to put all these complex emotions in such simple words that touch the readers hearts and actually makes them think and feel it. Could visualize all the things you penned down so clearly while reading it..you are amazing 👏 and hats off to Major and all other faujis out there and lots of love and respect to their families.
November 18th, 2023 at 8:58 pm
Thank you so much 🙏🏽🙏🏽😊
November 19th, 2023 at 10:43 am
Hats off to Fauji & understanding soul mate to him like you!👏👏👏👏👏 Beautifully expressed! ❤
November 19th, 2023 at 11:21 am
Thank you 🙏🏽😊
November 20th, 2023 at 2:36 pm
Wonderfully presented Preethi! Your expressions are simple and straightforward,yet touching the heart! Story telling, without exaggerating, comes to you naturally! The story was gripping till the end! Stay blessed always both of you!
November 20th, 2023 at 2:38 pm
Thank you 🙏🏽
November 20th, 2023 at 7:48 pm
Made me emotional literally!!! Felt like watching a beautiful love story and I wanted more and more to read . Well written Preethi ❤️
November 20th, 2023 at 8:08 pm
🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 thank you so much 😊
November 20th, 2023 at 9:34 pm
You have an Agatha Christie flair about you when you describe situations. So beautifully worded. You allow us to walk your walk through your narrative. I have worked in remote locations in days when we did not have mobile phones or even phones. One of the asks my family had was to send home a postcard (worth 15 valuable paise in those days), everyday. For then they knew everything was fine.
Thank you for sharing parts of your life with us – allowing us to participate in what it means to be a Fauji and his/her spouse.
Bhaskaran
November 20th, 2023 at 9:37 pm
Thank you so much for your kind words sir 🙏🏽 means a lot 😊
November 21st, 2023 at 10:26 am
Whoa! I’m literally speechless & wordless here, Rao! I don’t even know where to start.. Yet another beautiful article, so beautifully worded and loaded with emotions! We all have to thank you for giving us these eye popping yet beautiful glimpses of the lives of our Faujis! And beyond that, I don’t think anyone can ever pen the struggles and challenges of an Army wife so beautifully! As always I’m super proud of you & Major Saab and I’m sure the Universe will bless you only with the bestest of everything❤️
November 21st, 2023 at 10:28 am
🙏🏽😊thank you so much
November 21st, 2023 at 2:29 pm
Extraordinary writeup depicting an Army man’s life🥰🥰
Absolutely proud of you our dear “FAUJI”
November 21st, 2023 at 2:29 pm
🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽😊😊
November 21st, 2023 at 7:46 pm
Very beautifully penned dn….the suspense is interestngly revealed…😀 I liked the plot…very relatable…because even when you have spouses in IT industry , they would hardly be in India(year 2000). So I have kind of experienced those situations…very relatable. But only thing is I could be rest assured he is safe…unlike army wives. Thanks to army men and families that we sleep peacefully.
November 21st, 2023 at 7:47 pm
Thank you 🙏🏽😊
December 4th, 2023 at 12:51 am
Awesome, lovely. And I believe the key learning from the story applies to everyone (surely more so for the families of our heroes who live harsh lives to keep Indians safe).
Being able to see the life from a partner’s perspective without judgement and appreciating the same is key to successful friendships and relationships. Being able to put ourselves in their shoes, solves most of the gaps.
December 4th, 2023 at 7:12 am
Thank you 😊
December 7th, 2024 at 11:23 pm
Very nicely penned down dear 👌🏻 you have narrated very well 😊
December 8th, 2024 at 6:59 am
Thank you ❤️
August 11th, 2025 at 2:46 pm
So beautifully written Preethi, made me chuckle imagining your reaction 😂😂😂 It gives a perspective that we are all too familiar with but unable to put in words when we have to explain our absence to friends and family for some important occasions. Very well written, enjoyed the read🤗
August 11th, 2025 at 2:46 pm
Thank you so much 😊